


It's Not the Years, it's the Mileage

by sentimental_boy



Series: Eggsy Unwin shorts [9]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Not really charachter death, angst because I don't know how to write anything else, but he doesn't, fluff because I need a happy ending, you think Eggsy dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:41:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25461844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sentimental_boy/pseuds/sentimental_boy
Summary: You're reunited with Eggsy after leaving him for Kingsman years prior. It's... not great at first. Then you get him back, only to lose him again. But the mission always comes first, so you don't have time to grieve. Alone on your way to finish a mission you started together, you find Eggsy alive behind enemy lines.
Relationships: Gary "Eggsy" Unwin/Reader
Series: Eggsy Unwin shorts [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1409980
Kudos: 11





	It's Not the Years, it's the Mileage

You don’t know what to do. This mission went sideways so fast. You'd only been there a day and things were going well. You found your target and were on track tailing them, and getting information— as spies generally do. Except, it appears you weren’t being particularly _good_ spies. Because one-second Eggsy was right behind you, the next, his muffled voice was calling your name as strangers dragged him around the corner. Your first thought when he was crying for help was: Oh great, now they know he has a partner. Of course, you felt a pang of guilt that when dangerous men carted away the love of your life, _that_ was your first thought. But you didn't have time to dwell on that when you could still save him. Now, staring at the wreckage you caused, That guilt is back tenfold.

You’re brought out of your thoughts by Merlin calling your name through your headpiece.

“Merlin…” You have to take a second to compose yourself— swallow the lump in your throat— as you stare at the remains of the exploded vehicle that the men tossed Eggsy into only a couple minutes ago. The one whose driver _you_ shot. “I didn’t— I didn’t know that would happen. Why the _fuck_ would there be explosives on that truck? They took him because we were tailing them. Wouldn’t they keep him safe until they interrogated him?”

“Agent Kay, I need you to pull yourself together and finish the mission.”

“That’s it? You don’t even fucking care that Eggsy _died_? Just like that. It hasn’t even been—”

“That’s it.” He confirms with steel in his voice. “We don’t get the luxury of mourning when these things happen. Go walk it off, have a drink, whatever you need to do. I’m going to see what I can do to track where they went. Be ready to go in an hour.”

For a long time, it's like you're detached from your body, watching yourself stand in the wreckage. You try not to look too closely at the scene. Seeing any identifiable piece of Eggsy like this would break you. As it stands, you're in a daze, but one you'll be able to pull yourself out of. If your eyes landed on a Kingsman watch, still fastened to an arm or— you can't even think about it without feeling like falling to your knees. You don’t know how much longer you stand there with your stomach on the pavement next to you, replaying the events that led up to Eggsy’s death. You only get a hold of yourself when you hear the local authorities speeding in. You know better than to get caught up in that. Merlin would be so mad he might not bail you out. So you head to the nearest bar.

You can’t get as drunk as you’d like. You have a mission to finish. As much as you hate it, Merlin was right about that. So, you take your drink outside and nurse it, hoping that it’ll take the edge off, at least. As you sit there, staring out at the street, you can’t stop thinking about when you first saw Eggsy at Kingsman.

—0—

You’re coming back from the shooting range when you see a new face at the end of the hall. His chin is much too strong to be any agent around here. It’s funny, from far away he looks like the boy you used to date from the estates. You loved him. You still do, if you’re being honest with yourself. But you always told yourself that you wouldn’t be one of those people who settled down in their hometown with the first person who asked. So, when an opportunity came along to better yourself and the _world,_ love got put on the backburner.

As you draw closer to the man in the hallway, you realize that he doesn’t _look_ like Eggsy, he _is_ Eggsy. It’s all you can do not to let your jaw fall to the floor. As you’re coming to that realization, Eggsy’s stride slows and he doesn’t quite manage to keep the look of betrayal off his face.

“ _Eggsy_?” You let out a breath of disbelief.

He squares his shoulders and raises his chin as he says your name. His tone is cordial but everything else about him is barely shy of hostile. “So this is what you left me for?”

You don’t have a rebuttal because he’s right. “Eggsy, I’m sorry about how things ended between us.”

“When you told me I was just some man standin’ in the way of your dreams? The part where you forgot to tell me for _two years_ that our relationship was a fun way for you to gain some experience before you made your way into the upper class?”

“The first part of that is an oversimplification and the second is inaccurate at best. I fucking loved you.”

“Yeah, well, you’ve got what you wanted.” He gestures to the polished halls you’re standing in.

“It’s not that simple and you know it.”

“Let’s just stay out of each other’s way, yeah?”

—0—

It takes every second of your training to fight back the tears thinking about him. You begged Merlin to pair either of you with someone else for this mission but he didn’t give a fuck about your personal problems and put you together anyway. You had to share a motel room and instead of being at each other’s throats like you were sure you would be, it only served to remind you why you loved him. There’s a morbid sense of irony about this. You finally had Eggsy back in your life, and against all odds, you were _back together,_ and now you’re responsible for his death.

—0—

The plane ride here was excruciating. Eggsy had his headphones in while he played a game on his phone and you cycled through the same three social media apps. The white noise of the plane was deafening. You’d love to listen to music, but you don’t want even the smallest obstacle to stand in the way if Eggsy decides he’s willing to talk to you about anything other than the mission. There was a moment you glanced up from your phone to see him already looking at you. He didn’t rush to look away once he was caught and for a second, you thought he was going to say something. But he just sat there, looking you over for a minute. As you were about to ask after it, he went back to his phone.

He didn’t utter a word until you were in the elevator at your motel. “I um, I’ve been thinkin’ about how this is goin’ to work the entire plane ride. Well, since Merlin assigned us to this mission,” He amends. “Best case scenario: if we don’t trust each other, we will fail.”

“Worst case: one or both of us will die.” You agree.

He nods. “We need to figure out how to have a working relationship. I say we put our things in the room, head to the nearest establishment that sells alcohol, and get drunk enough to talk, but not enough that we’ll have a hangover tomorrow.”

The elevator doors open and you find your way down the hall to your room.

You let out a humorless laugh. "How sensible of you." You mutter as you shoulder the door open.

"You got a better idea?" He asks as he closes the door behind him.

“Do you really need to be drunk to talk to me?”

He sighs. “I don’t need to tell you that I loved you too. I know it was clear how gone I was for you. When you left, it hurt like fuck.”

“I can only say I’m sorry so many times.”

“And how many ties is that? Because I only heard it once.”

“I’m sorry.”

He lets out a long sigh. “Unfortunately, that don’t fix things.”

“I know.” You know there isn’t a good way for him to react to what you’re about to say, but you have to say it anyway. “I’ve missed you, Eggs.” He looks like you turned around and punched him in the stomach. It kills you to see that look on his face because of you. “I— can I be honest with you?”

“I guess that would be best.” He sighs.

“I don’t expect any sort of response from you; I know I don’t deserve one. And I know that I can’t say that you’re the one that got away when I’m the one who left, but I never stopped thinking about you. There hasn’t been anyone else who mattered.” He’s completely unresponsive for a long minute. Long enough that you wonder if you should leave him here and go get a bottle of wine. You’re about to do that when he finally speaks up.

“You know, all this time, that’s all I ever wanted to hear. ” He looks out the window as he says it. “God, I _wish_ it was that fuckin’ easy. But I gotta protect myself now.” He shrugs. “It feels better havin’ the truth out there between us, though. So thanks for that.”

“It’s literally the least I could do.” You let out a breath. “I could use a drink, you want to go get that wine?”

“Alright, miss ‘ _do you really need to be drunk to talk to me?_ ’” He mocks.

You’re surprised at his playful tone, but you don’t think anything’s ever made you happier. “What can I say? You were right.”

“I’m sorry, did you just— I’m _what_ now?”

“Don’t push it.”

“There she is.”

You roll your eyes. “Come on.”

Once you make it back to the room, wine bottle in hand, Eggsy grabs two glasses from the top of the mini-fridge. He watches you take a seat on your bed as he sets the glasses down on the side table. He’s… a _sight_. You always knew he was hot, but here, still dressed in his bespoke suit, tie long forgotten, the top 3 buttons of his shirt undone, his hair starting to fight against the product holding it in place as he stands there and pours two glasses of wine… you don’t think he’s ever been more attractive.

He sets the bottle down, takes off his jacket and cufflinks, and cuffs his sleeves once before he picks up his glass and holds it up. “To our relationship healing.”

“To healing.” You repeat.

“Cheers.” He says before he takes a sip and sits on the bed across from yours. “So, uh, is this what you’ve been doing the last few years?”

You shrug. “Pretty much.”

He nods. “So bein’ on a mission with me must be like babysittin’ for you.”

“Come on, Eggs. You’re new, not incapable. You wouldn’t be here if you were.”

“Still, there are things only experience can teach.”

“Things like PTSD, but you already wake up in the night scared for you and your mum’s life.” You pause. “Or you used to.”

“That’s actually gotten better since I started. I’m stayin’ in Harry’s old place and I got my mum and Daisy set up in the ‘ouse I was supposed to move into. First thing I did after I fought my way through V-day, was teach Dean an’ his dogs some manners.”

“I bet that felt good.”

“It felt fuckin’ fantastic.” He grins.

“I’m glad.” You pause. “So uh, who’s Daisy?”

“Hmm?” He looks confused for a minute before realization dawns on him. “Fuck, you don’t know. I’ve got a sister. She’s 2 and the sweetest thing you’ll ever meet.”

“Eggsy, that’s great! That’s quite the age gap, though.”

He shrugs. “It’s just as well. Dean never went after ‘er, thank fuck. If it had ‘appened sooner, as she got older, he would’ve started picking on ‘er an’ I would’ve had a little girl to protect. It’s not like my mum would’ve been able to do anythin’, hopped up on drugs as she was. As it was, the only reason Dean ever gave me an inch of leeway was because I was _her_ son. Can’t imagine if I was a girl an’ he was my dad.”

“So, he doesn’t have visitation rights or anything?”

Eggsy shrugs. “We took her when we left. He don’t know where we are an’ he ain’t come lookin’ for ‘er.”

You hum. “Sounds like you should take this to the courts anyway. Someone like him would fight it just to gain some control. The longer you wait, the better chance he'll have of winning a case.”

He sighs. “Yeah, I know. It’s hard emotionally, dealin’ with all that. An’ you know how domestic abuse cases go in court. We ain't got much proof an’ I don’t want to make him feel like he’s got somethin’ to prove. He’s leavin’ us alone now.”

“Yeah. That makes sense.”

He nods, clearly a ways away.

Now’s as good a time as any to change the subject, so you move on. “Hey, do you remember all those times we snuck out and went and sat on the roof, how we’d be out under the stars all night?”

He glances up before letting out a laugh through his nose and taking a sip of his wine. “Course I do,” he pauses. “Remember when we fell asleep up there an’ we woke up an’ it was pourin’ rain?” He grins.

You laugh. “Yeah. I’m surprised we made it back without slipping and dying.”

He chuckles as he lays back and looks at the ceiling. He stays that way for a moment before he pipes up again. “Hey, you think this place has roof access?”

“I don’t know. Don’t think I want to climb the steps to find out.”

“Come on,” He sits back up. “For the people we used to be.”

“You’re a goddamned romantic, Eggsy.” You laugh.

“Is that a yes?” It’s cute how excited he is.

“Yeah, alright. Let me get my coat.”

Once you’re on the roof, you turn to him. “Is it everything you dreamed it would be?”

“Nah.” He shakes his head and puts his hands in his pockets. _We’re not together anymore_ , he thinks. “This roof was made for bein’ on. It’s not as fun.” He says.

“Or maybe it's that we’re not teenagers anymore.”

He shakes his head. “That ain’t it. You may be old and jaded, but I ‘aven’t lost my sense of wonder yet.”

“I’m barely a year older than you.” You laugh.

He shrugs with that cheeky grin of his. “I don’t make the rules.”

You let out a skeptical hum and cross your arms. “Sure sounds like you’re making shit up, to me.”

He laughs. “You know, it ain’t the same, but it sure is beautiful up here.” He’s not looking at the city as he says it but his gaze moves from your eyes, off into the distance sooner than you’d like.

“It is.” You agree. You’re not talking about the city either. All you want to do is go over and wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on his shoulder. Have him lean back against you and rest his hand over yours where they’re clasped over his stomach. But you know that what he’s giving you right now is more than you deserve after you broke his heart. So, you end up at his side.

It’s not lost on him how close your hands are now. Not that he thinks you put yourself here for that purpose. He can see how bad you feel for leaving the way you did— or at all. And he is a Kingsman himself now. He’s positive his mum would have something to say about him lying to his family like this. He made sacrifices to take this job and so did you. It’s just shitty that _he_ had to be one of the sacrifices you made. But he can see that it’s been tearing you up the whole time you’ve been apart. You never stopped loving him. It’s enough for now.

He reaches over and takes your hand in his. You jump at the feeling and Eggsy turns to you with a little grin. “You alright, love?”

“I— yeah. I’m confused, but alright.”

He sighs and adjusts his grip on your hand. “I’ve thought about it a lot and I might’ve been a bit hard on you.”

“I hurt you because of this goddamned job. I don’t blame you for anything.”

“Yeah, this job that I have too now. I understand that it takes sacrifices— sometimes including loved ones— to do this. I understood that the first time I saw you at Kingsman. It at least warranted a discussion, not me throwing around accusations.”

“What happened to you needing to protect yourself?”

He shrugs. “I see how broken up you are about this. I don’t want you to feel bad— you’ve done more than enough of that— but seein’ that you do helped me understand how much you still care about me.”

“I never stopped. You know, Harry wasn’t the only Kingsman looking out for you.”

“Yeah?” He smiles, running his thumb over your hand.

“It wasn’t invasive or anything. I just needed to know you were safe.”

“It’s okay.” He lets out a little laugh, like it’s ridiculous to think anything else.

“So, what’s up with this?” You hold your intertwined hands up

“Not to sound like the Beatles or anythin’ but I wanted to hold your hand.”

“Cute. I mean, what are we doing? Are we starting off as friends who hold hands, or are we getting back together?”

“You’d want that?” He murmurs.

“Yes, I’d want that.” You squeeze his hand.

He turns to you, taking your other hand in his to prompt you to do the same, and takes a step closer. “I never got over you either, you know. I slept around, even tried to date a couple of people. They were nice an’ all but I was still in love with you.” He lets out a breath. “I _am_ still in love with you.” He leans in to bury his face in your neck, nosing along your jawline to your collarbone, planting soft kisses as he goes.

You free one of your hands from his to come to rest in his hair and his free hand goes to your waist. “Fuck, Eggsy, I love you too. Always have.”

He stands up straight and looks you in the eyes for what feels like a long minute. It’s probably only a few seconds. He leans in nice and slow, very romantic, but it’s been years since you got to touch him and slow isn’t going to do it tonight. You lean in and connect your lips, running your hands down his body until you get to his ass and haul him forward so your bodies are pressed together. You can feel his grin against your mouth before he kisses you back with fervor.

He breaks away from the kiss with effort, breathing deeply. “You wanna ‘ead back to the room?” His eyes dart across your face as he waits for you to answer.

“Absolutely.”

—0—

You’re so busy staring into the bottom of your empty glass, going over the events of last night, that you almost don’t hear Merlin at all. As it is, he has to say your name a few times.

You hum in question before you grab hold of yourself. “Sorry, Merlin, what do you have for me?”

“Jesus, Kay, how many did you have?”

“Only a couple.” Merlin can’t glare at you but his silence is enough to pry the truth from you. “Alright, a few. So what? I lost a loved one, not just a colleague. I told you not to put us on this fucking mission together.”

“Now is not the time to grieve and don’t you dare try to blame this on me. Eggsy is dead because a mission went sideways. We do everything we can to keep our agents safe but these things happen. You know the risks going in.” You hear him sigh on the other end. “Now remember your goddamn training and deal with it later. I have a location for you. Order something to eat and sober up while I brief you.”

—0—

Eggsy wakes bound and gagged to a support beam in a strange room. It looks… mobile, like they're used to moving their base around, hence the exposed beam he’s tied to. An older woman turns around from where she’s working at a desk in front of him.

“Hey, handsome.” She trails her index finger from where his collar starts at his Adam's apple, up under his chin, grabbing it and forcing him to look at her. “They told me I’d like you.”

Eggsy’s skin crawls as she touches him. He doesn’t like where this conversation is headed either. He fixes his best glare at her but he’s sure the gravity of it is overshadowed by the position he’s in.

Sure enough, she laughs at the hard set of his brows and hatred in his eyes; how his teeth grind against the gag. “You’re absolutely adorable.”

He yanks his head out of her grip. It’s all he can do in defiance at the moment.

She runs her hand through his hair, messing it up. “You do understand your situation, don’t you?” When he continues to glare at her she slaps him across the face. “I guess I’ll have to explain. You’re mine now. I own you. Your body, your mind, it’s all mine. I’m going to start with a series of yes or no questions and you will answer me by shaking or nodding your head. That little scowl was cute at first, I expect resistance, but it’s disrespectful now, do you understand?”

He doesn’t change his expression, he has plenty to say to her if she’d take this gag out.

She punches him in the gut this time. As he gasps for breath through the gag, she continues. “We’ll graduate to an adult conversation when you learn to respect me. This is the last chance I’m giving you today to learn. Do you understand?”

He takes a deep breath and nods.

“Better, but you’re still scowling.”

He’s too angry to change his expression. It’s all he could do to force himself to nod.

“Alright. We’ll try again tomorrow.” On her way out, she talks to a guard, making sure Eggsy can hear. “He doesn’t eat or drink until I say so.”

Eggsy hopes to god you find him soon. He doesn’t want to think about the things she’ll tell him to do, the questions she’ll ask, and she’s made it clear that it’ll be worse for him if he drags this out. Not that it’ll stop him. He is a Kingman after all. He didn’t snitch when he was still a recruit, thinking a train was about to run him over, and he won’t now.

He doesn’t know how long he sits like that. He knows his shoulders and back and ass hurt. He knows he’s tired, and hungry, and angry, and he’s trying very hard not to let any of this scare him. It has to be hours later when someone comes in. He knows that can’t be good, but a couple of hits and a few hours tied up alone aren’t enough to root out his defiance. He can’t see much, behind the desk as he is, but he sticks his chin out and sets his brows into a hard line, waiting for his next session to start.

—0—

You’re supposed to be finding information on some computer, but this is the third room you’ve checked and you don’t know how many more you can sneak into. Thank fuck there was a changing of the guard, otherwise, you wouldn’t have been able to get into _this_ one. There’s a single desk in this room, with a computer that looks like the one you’ve been trying to find, thank fuck. You’re about to make your way over to the computer, but you hear shuffling in the back corner of the room. You proceed with caution, now that you know you’re not alone. As you walk over, and the desk isn’t obstructing your view of the corner of the room anymore, a man comes into view. You just about drop the tech Merlin gave you that you’re supposed to use to steal the information with when you see him. It’s _Eggsy_ , tied to a support beam with a piece of cloth strapped between his teeth.

You rush over to him and fall to your knees, scrambling to untie the gag around his mouth. You manage to loosen it enough to slip it out of his mouth and let it fall around his neck.

“Thank—” He starts, but you cut him off with a kiss.

“Fuck, I thought you were dead.” You have to will away the tears that threaten to spill from your eyes as you look him over, real and _alive_ in front of you.”

“What? Why would you—” He stops. “You can tell me later. Cut me loose.”

You go for your knife, but you hear footsteps by the door so you stop to listen.

He furrows his brows as he watches you hesitate. “Babes, come on. They’re going to check on me when they come back. We need to be gone by then.”

“Eggs, I’m sorry.” You slip the gag back between his teeth again. “Sit still and be quiet.” You tell him before you rush to hide under the desk. You’re barely in place before the door swings open and a pair of heels click in.

“Good evening. I thought I’d extend an olive branch, see if some food would help that temper.”

Eggsy only fixes her with a glare.

“Fine. If violence is all you respond to, we’ll start in on that tomorrow. But you’re dining with me tonight. You’ll need your strength if you’re going to continue to be this stubborn.” She slips the flat of a knife under the gag and against his cheek before she turns it and cuts it off his face.

“I don’t suppose you’ll be taking no for an answer.”

“You would rather go hungry than share a meal with me?”

“Hospitality hasn’t been your strong suit so far. I don’t believe any kindness from you would come without a price.”

She cuts the ties binding his wrists and shrugs. “Violence is necessary to achieve my goal. I don’t take any pleasure in it, though. I’m not a psychopath.”

Eggsy lets out a laugh in disbelief as he rolls his shoulders, trying to work out the kinks.

“I mean it. I’m hoping that if we can break bread together, you’ll see that there’s no need for all this… unpleasantness. I much prefer a... _softer_ touch.” She runs her hand up his chest.

“I understand my position ‘ere, but if you truly want to act like civilized people, that ain’t on the menu, luv.” He brushes her hands away.

She frowns. “You’re no fun.”

“Bein’ tied to that fuckin’ pole all day wasn’t my idea of fun, neither.”

“You wouldn’t be talking with me otherwise.”

“You’re right.”

“I know. Go wash up.” She nods over to a bowl of water in the corner. “I’ll take your shirt, tie, and jacket.”

Eggsy grits his teeth but does as he’s bid.

She watches like a hawk as he washes his hands and tuts when he goes for the towel. “You aren’t done, are you?”

“What, you want me to take a whore bath with you staring at me like I’m a piece of meat? I thought we was goin’ for a pleasant meal.”

“Oh, I think it’ll be plenty pleasant.”

Eggsy grumbles about it as she throws his clothes on the desk and goes to sit at the little table. He tries to be as efficient as possible, but the way she’s grinning and sipping on her wine makes his skin crawl. At least if she’s looking at him, you’re safe where you’re hiding under the desk.

“Now that you’ve had your show, can I eat?”

“That’s what I offered, isn’t it?”

He shrugs and takes a seat across from her. “I got no reason to believe you.”

The whole thing can’t reasonably last more than an hour. When she untied Eggsy, you transferred the information you needed with some wireless gadget Merlin devised. You don’t pretend to understand what he does. The rest of the time, you have to sit still and listen from under the desk, waiting for her to tire of objectifying Eggsy and talking down to him every chance she gets. And what will she find when she comes around to her desk? There’s no way she won’t see you. You’re sending out a plea to the universe or whatever deity might be out there that she’ll finish her food and leave. Not soon enough, that plea is answered but not before she ties Eggsy back up.

Eggsy very pointedly keeps his eyes on her the whole time. Which you know, because you have a clear view of them. If she has even the smallest temptation to turn around, she’ll see you, so Eggsy doesn’t give her one.

“Don’t suppose I get my clothes back.” He mumbles as she secures his wrists together behind him.

“You’d rather get back into these sweaty clothes than show off your gorgeous physique?”

“Ain’t no one here I’d like to show off for.” He lies, staring her in the eye while you sit behind her.

“I was going to give you a break from the gag tonight since you were so good and quiet while I was gone earlier. But you don’t know when to stop, do you?”

“Guess not.” He opens his mouth so she can put the gag in.

“Don’t mistake my kindness tonight for weakness. You’ll pay for your attitude tomorrow.” She punctuates her statement with a rough tug at the gag as she ties it off behind his head.

He watches her stand and walk out, keeping his eyes on the door until it shuts. Once you’re alone, he sags in his binds.

“Eggsy, you did so fuckin’ great back there.” You tell him as you untie the gag. “I have no idea how you kept your head on while she talked to you like that.” You let out a breath and shake your head as you move on to his wrists. “Fuck, _I_ was about to blow our cover and take her out right there.”

He laughs and runs his hands up your arms once you cut him free. “I would’ve _loved_ to see you start a brawl defending my honor with a high profile target.” He leans in and kisses you.

You hum into the kiss, letting yourself enjoy your newly rekindled relationship for a moment. “Maybe next time. We still need to get out of here.”

“Before we do, I—” He pauses. “I just need you to know how happy I am we found each other again.”

You’re a bit confused at what brought this on, but you smile at him. “Yeah, me too.” You murmur. “But why do you need to tell me now? You planning on doing something stupid out there?”

He chuckles and shakes his head. “Not planning on it, but we have no idea what’s outside that door or who we’re going to have to fight. I need you to know in case you have to leave me behind—”

“Eggs, I don’t give a shit what happens out there, I’m not leaving you behind.”

“Babes, I know it’s not something any of us want to think about, but I’m trying to be realistic for a minute here. I had a lot of time by myself to think, while the very real prospect of being tortured was right in front of me. The thing I regretted most was how closed off I was with you.”

“We already went over this. I understand why you were like that. It’s a very reasonable reaction to getting your heart broken.”

“I know but I kept thinking about the plane ride here. How we kept making eye contact. How everything about your body language told me you were ready for a conversation but I refused. How we could’ve spent that much more time together.”

You shrug. “It is what it is. But we’re both here now. You’re solid, and warm, and _alive_ beneath my hands and now we’ll have plenty of time together.”

“That’s right, you said something earlier about thinkin’ I was dead.”

“We can talk about that when we’re safe.”

He nods and gives you one more kiss. “Alright, then. You ready?”

—0—

Eggsy was right. Neither of you knew what was waiting on the other side of that door. You took care of the two guards in the hall quickly and quietly. It wasn’t until you got outside the camp that you had to fight your way out.

“We’re not both making it out of here.” You mutter as you study the guards at the gate.

“Like fuck we ain’t. You think you got a monopoly on the whole ‘ _I’m not leaving you behind’_ business? I ain’t leavin’ you neither.”

“Yes, you are. Listen, I might be able to take those guards, but we have to make sure this information gets back to Kingsman. Take this.” You hand him the drive Merlin made. “I transferred the files on her computer onto this when you were eating with her.” You look him over, realizing he doesn’t have most of his Kingsman gadgets anymore. “Take my tie clip too. Use the laser to cut a hole in the fence, and follow the main road. I have our car parked half a mile out that way.” You point.

He shakes his head. “Great plan, why don’t we both do that?”

“Eggsy, do you see the layout? You’re going to be out in the open. Which means you’ll need a distraction. And before you ask, you’re the one running because you’re shirtless and I still have my bulletproof suit on. Wait until we’re fighting to go. I love you, I’ll meet you at the hotel if I make it out.” You lean in and kiss him before you sprint off, not giving him any time to argue.

“Fuck.” He mutters. He knows you’re right. He can practically hear Merlin in his ear telling him to remember his training and to do as he’s told. It’s a good plan. Or at least the best one you have right now, so he goes.

—0—

As you knock out the last of the guards fighting you, you let out a breath of relief. Now you have to find— as your eyes go to the side gate Eggsy escaped from, you see a new slew of guards charging at you. The main gate is, of course, closed. So the only way you’re getting out of here is if you scale the fence. You make a break for it, sprinting to the fence and jumping, giving yourself less area to climb. It’s the worst, and you hid under a table while some lady drooled over your boyfriend. Chain Link was not meant for climbing, but you’re a trained agent who isn’t going to let some fencing get in your way. The real problem is going to be when you get to the twisting circle of barbed wire at the top. You get a little over midway up when a car— _your_ car comes speeding down the road and crashes into the chainlink, tearing the bottom up and out of the ground.

The window rolls down and you see Eggsy behind the wheel. “Come on, love, we ain't got all day.” He calls, backing up so you can climb under the fence.

You take one look at the men making their way across the lot and decide you have to jump. It’s going to hurt like fuck— you might even break a bone, but it’s the fastest way down. Turns out: your arm is what you fall on. You have no way to gauge the extent of your injury, but judging by the pain, it’s broken. You probably dislocated a rib while you were at it. Then they start shooting. You put your arm up to shield your face. The bullets hurt like fuck against your injured arm— and everywhere else— but you don’t have time to care about that as you scramble under the fence. The metal is unforgiving against your neck and ankles where it scrapes against your skin. You cannot wait for this mission to be over.

You barely have time to close the car door behind you before Eggsy’s speeding off.

“You alright, love?” He glances over at you. “That looked like a nasty fall.”

You wince as you try to situate yourself in the passenger seat. “My arm is fucked and it feels like I dislocated a rib. Bullets hurt like fuck, as you know. I’m so fuckin’ done right now.”

“I’m sorry.” He murmurs. “You can say whatever bullshit you want about getting Merlin that information, but I know you did that for me.”

“It was the only chance we had of both of us making it out. You wouldn’t have survived that with the state you’re in. Besides, you did your time, being tied up in that room.”

“Right.” He doesn’t sound convinced. “Well, Merlin has a jet waiting for us and we’ll be back home in no time.” He glances over at you as you nod, still preoccupied with your pain. “It’s alright, love. Put your seat back and try to relax. I’ll get you there safe. You ain't gotta worry about anythin’ else.”

—0—

You wake up to Eggsy hovering over you from the passenger doorway, unbuckling your seatbelt.

“Eggs?” You murmur.

“Hey.” He gives you a smile as soft as his voice before he backs away and rests his arms on the roof of the car as he looks down at you. “We’re here. I was going to carry you on board, but I don’t suppose you’re going to let me do that now.”

“You’re right.”

He sighs and looks around. “Can I at least help you out?” He holds his hands out.

You pull your seat up and take his hands. You wince as you get up and Eggsy draws closer to your side. It’s sweet, how worried he is when most of your wounds are superficial. Once you clear the door, he shuts it behind you and helps you on the jet.

As you board, the pilot eyes your injuries and Eggsy’s state of undress. “You know basic first aid?” He asks Eggsy.

“Yeah, mate. Just worry about gettin’ us home.”

You elbow him. “Don’t be a dick.”

Eggsy sighs. “Sorry, bruv. It was meant to be reassuring. Been a long day.”

The pilot gives a curt nod and goes to the cockpit. “There are some spare shirts back there too.” He throws over his shoulder.

Eggsy helps you hobble to the back of the plane where there’s a small cot tucked into the wall. “Come on, lie down.” He guides you into the cubby.

“Eggsy, thank you, but I’m fine.”

He raises a brow at you. “Well you ain’t gonna spend the whole plane ride standin’, so at least sit-down and let me look you over.”

You let him help you take your jacket off before you sit.

“There you go.” He cups the back of your head and plants a kiss on top before he slides the privacy screen shut and takes off his glasses. “Now, can you take your shirt off so I can clean you up?” He asks, already setting up the first aid kit.

You stare at him for a moment before you start unbuttoning your shirt. His back is to you as he grabs two fresh shirts from the overhead compartment.

When Eggsy turns around, his breath catches in his throat. _Damn it, not right now_. He berates himself. When he thought about it, he swore he’d be able to help you without being horny, but you’re sitting there with your makeup smeared, and your breasts just _there_ , even if they’re mostly covered by your bra. It’s built for support, not a gossamer thing, there to reveal more than it hides like he’s used to seeing. But it doesn’t make much difference to him, apparently. He pushes all that aside, though because you’re in pain and a mess, and he’s here to help you, damn it.

“You finished staring at my tits?”

He clears his throat and moves to pour alcohol on some gauze. “Sorry.”

You wince as you lean forward, reaching out and running your hand from his bicep, up over his shoulder. “I’m joking. I think it’s cute that you still have that reaction after you’ve seen them so many times.”

When he turns back to you, he’s letting out a laugh that says: I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. “It’s been a while.” He shrugs. “They’re fuckin’ fantastic anyway, though.” He adds as he strokes your face with the gauze, wiping away the sweat and blood from the fight. Something about the way he’s looking at you, brows furrowed in concentration, how distracted he sounds as he cleans you up, makes the moment feel soft, no matter what stupid jokes the two of you have been making. “Now, are you gonna make fun of me for lookin’ at you if I check your other injuries?”

“Depends on how much gawking you’re doing.”

“Well, I’m sorry I got caught up in how lovely you are, even though you’re not trying.”

You hum. “That’s hardly a hot take. Anyway, they’re tits, Eggs. Nobody has to _try_ to make a man attracted to tits.”

“You make me sound like a one-dimensional arsehole.”

You let out a laugh and pull him down for a kiss. “Love you.” You murmur, your forehead pressed to his, your hand resting on the back of his neck. “I’m teasing.”

He moves to take a seat on the cot next to you. “I know.”

You take his hand as you lean on his shoulder and think about how you almost lost this. It hurts your rib, leaning at this angle, but your whole body aches anyway. You don’t care if it means you can share an intimate moment with Eggsy. You bring his hand to your face and place a kiss to his knuckles. “Fuck.” You breathe. “I love you so fucking much.”

He frees his hand from yours and wraps his arm around you. “Hey, I love you too. What’s goin’ on over there?” He turns and brushes his free hand through your hair.

“Eggs, I thought I lost you.”

“You mentioned that earlier. You mean when they took me?”

“No— I mean, yes, but I thought you were _dead_. I heard you call out for me when they took you.”

He shakes his head. “I’m sorry, that was _so_ stupid.”

“No. Well, I thought that at first too, but I’ve felt guilty about that since then.”

He shrugs. “You’re right. Ain’t no reason to feel guilty.”

“Eggs, I’ve been in love with you for years. Every day since I left you, I thought about what a shitty fucking decision it was. Then, against your better judgement, you let me back into your life. We’d _finally_ reconnected. Then you get taken by dangerous people and your knee-jerk response is to call for me— trained agent and woman who loves you— and my first thought is about the goddamned mission.”

He holds you tighter and you draw in a sharp breath at the pain. “Fuck, sorry.” He murmurs as he readjusts, watching you closely to make sure you’re comfortable. “Don’t let Merlin hear you talkin’ like I’m more important than the mission, though. He won’t ever let us work together again.”

“Eggsy, I love you and you’re great at what you do, but _I_ don’t think I could handle us being on another mission together.”

He frowns and goes quiet.

“What, you thought that went _well_?”

“Well, of course not. I understand that you don’t, but I’d still love to work together again. Imagine going undercover as a rich couple. Our _job_ would be to get all fancy and hang off each other all night— make the whole room jealous of what we have.”

You can’t help but grin at the thought. “That _would_ be fun.”

“Yeah, and who knows, I might not even get kidnapped and put a wrench in the whole plan next time.”

You twist to look at him and hurt yourself again.

He puts a soft hand on your side to steady you, but even that hurts. “Hey, easy, love.”

“Yeah.” You huff, frustrated. “Eggsy, you know you didn’t fuck this mission up, right?”

He looks away. “Thanks, but I don’t see how that can be true.”

“Eggs— you know damn well that missions rarely have such fleshed out plans and that when they do, they always go to shit. There’s _always_ some variable we can’t account for. Oftentimes we pay the price for that. You’re hardly the first or last agent to get kidnapped. It has nothing to do with your skill level and it’s not your fault.”

He nods. “Thanks for sayin’ that.”

“It’s true.” You pause. “Is _that_ why you thought I didn’t want to work with you again?”

He shrugs.

“Fuck. Not at all. I don’t want to work with you again because I care about you too much. Yes, I care about all my coworkers, but I’m not _in love_ with them. I can look at it objectively and know that they chose this life the same as me and do what’s best for the mission and let Merlin deal with extraction like he’s supposed to. With you— _fuck_. When I thought you died—” You put your hand over your mouth and hold in a sob.

He runs his hand up and down your bicep, grounding you. “Hey, I’m here. We’re both safe, you’ve got me.”

You take a deep breath. “I know. I know that now. But for a day, I thought I watched— I thought I fucking killed you.”

“ _What_?”

“I— when they took you, I tried to go after you. But there was chaos and I lost you a couple of times before I thought I finally saw them throw you in a truck. It was driving toward me, and I shot the driver. Took me a couple of shots, and there were explosives in the back. I watched that truck explode and tried not to look too hard at the bits of _people_ scattered in the street as I stood there frozen. Merlin saw the whole thing happen through my glasses. If he hadn’t kicked my ass into gear after that, we wouldn’t be on our way home right now.”

He shakes his head. “I can’t imagine that. Like, the second I start to think about losing you like that— not to mention thinking I was _responsible_ , my brain just shuts it out. Even saying it right now, it’s all words. My mind won’t come up with any imagery or feelings about the situation because I can’t process it. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”

“Yeah, it was shit.” You murmur. “But when I walked in that room and saw you—” You shake your head. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. I know I didn’t lose you for very long, but having you back now feels so surreal.”

“Well, I am back now. And I’m real, which means that I’m going to insist you sit back and let me tend to your wounds.”

You grumble. “I’m fine. I’m going straight to medical when we land, I just want to sit here with you and rest.”

“I’d like that too. The sooner you let me look at you, the sooner we get to spend the rest of the flight doing that.”

You let out a huff and sit back.

He can’t help but grin, watching you act like a child. “There you go, perfect.” He goes for the disinfectant and cleans the few open wounds he sees as he comes across them. “Can you lean forward for me? I think I see some scrapes on your neck.”

“Yeah, the fence got me on my way out.”

Eggsy winces as he looks at the deep scratches and swipes the cleaning swab over them. He knows first hand how bad it can sting. “Sorry. Wish I could’ve made a cleaner exit for ya.”

“You did more than I asked you to. The barbed wire at the top of that fence would’ve been a whole lot worse than this.”

He raises a brow and nods his head to the side. “Yeah. Glad I got there in time.”

“Me too.” He sits you back and you grunt in pain.

He looks up at you. “I’m sorry.” He lets out a breath, looking at your chest and stomach riddled with bruises from the bullets. He knows you have even more injuries than what he can see, too. “Shit. Is there anywhere that _doesn’t_ hurt?”

You huff, fed up with being in pain. “Here.” You point to your elbow.

Eggsy hides a grin. He knows better than to laugh at you right now, but it’s funny, seeing you pout and whine when he’s seen you fight. He knows you wouldn’t do this in front of anyone else either, knows he _gets_ to see this side of you. So, he takes your arm in his hand and leans down to place a soft kiss on your elbow. He lets his eyes flutter open and looks up at you from under his lashes. “Where else?”

You look into his eyes for a minute, watching him sit there, patiently waiting for instructions. “Here.” You point to the rib that isn’t dislocated.

He leans down and places a kiss to your rib before he looks up at you again. “Anywhere else?”

“Here.” You point to your collarbone where there’s a patch of clear skin amidst the bruises.

He leans in and kisses it. This time, he doesn’t have to ask. He looks up, and you point to your brow, watching as he draws closer. After he places a soft kiss there, he pulls back enough to look at you, but not enough to lose the moment. He takes your chin in his hand and runs his thumb over your bottom lip.

“How ‘bout here? How does that feel?”

“It doesn’t hurt.” You meant to deliver the words with an air of nonchalance, but you’re too distracted by his eyes, boring into yours, and it comes out as a breathless murmur.

“Good.” He leans in and presses his lips to yours. You try to sit up and press further into the kiss, but Eggsy puts a gentle hand on your chest. “Relax. Let me come to you so you don’t hurt yourself. I know your whole right side is fucked right now. I ain’t about to make that worse.”

“Alright, then get down here.” You grin.

“I’m tryin’, there ain’t a lot of room on this cot, if you didn’t notice.”

You don’t say anything else as you watch him get situated, putting those biceps to good use as he hovers over you. He leans in and presses his lips to yours, and strong as he is, it’s been a long day and you can feel his arms shaking at your sides. You place a lingering kiss to his lips before you run your hands along his arms. “Hey, help me up?”

He sits up but doesn’t move to help you. “You should stay as still as you can until you get some proper medical treatment.”

You roll your eyes. “It’s fine, Eggs. It’s just a few scrapes and bruises.”

“I hate seein’ ‘em on you, though. Makes me want to wrap you in blankets and make sure nothin’ ever hurts you again.”

“I understand. If roles were reversed I’d feel the same way. Fuck, I still do. I thought you were _dead_. Then I stumbled across you, only to find you at the mercy of some lunatic. Makes me want to do everything I can to make you quit. But I also know that you have to do this, same as me.”

He runs the back of his hand over your cheek and stares into your eyes. It’s clear from the forlorn look on his face that he knows you’re right. “I guess if we’re both gonna do this, we gotta find a way to appreciate moments like these, yeah?”

You nod and lean into his touch, so he flips his hand over to cup your face as he runs his thumb over your cheek.

“Hey, you still want to sit up?”

“Yeah.” You wince as you get your arms underneath you.

“If you wait for me it won’t be so painful.” He moves to support your back as he pulls you up. “See?”

“Yeah, but I hate lying there helpless.”

He takes a seat next to you. “I know, but when you’re hurt like this—” his brain is still trying to finish his sentence, but your lips are pressed to his, effectively derailing his train of thought. When you pull back, for a moment all he can do is let his eyes flutter open and stare at you.

“We don’t need to talk about it anymore for now. Now, what do you say to snogging for the rest of the plane ride?”

“If you think it’ll make you feel better, I’m nothin’ but a good nurse.” He winks.


End file.
